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Today's jokes [4.22.13]

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What do you call a dog with no back legs and balls of steel?

Sparky

Sent by Shawn


1. 




Girl woke up in the morning after a party and found an Elephant in bed
beside her.
She said "I must have been tight last night"
The Elephant said "You were the first time but second time was'nt so bad"

Sent by lcg

2. 




There was a scottsman and he was too drunk to walk home 
from the bar.  He decides to lay down a park bench and 
sleep.  Tomorrow he would walk home after he was sober.  In 
the morning two little girls are walking by to go to school 
when they see he is wearing his kilt.  One of the little girls 
get curious and decide to lift up his kilt. They see he's not 
wearing anything under his kilt so one of the little girls takes 
a blue ribbon out of her hair and ties it around his thing in a 
nice little bow.  They put his kilt back down and go to school.  
A little while after the man wakes up and natures calling.  He 
finds the nearest bush, lifts up his kilt and looks down. He 
says in his scotish accent, "I don't know where ya been but ya 
won first prize."

Sent by Alvin

3. 




They now have an Italian airline that flies out of Genoa.

It's called Genitalia.


Sent by maria

4. 




Imagine you`re in a room with no windows and no doors,
how do you get out?

Stop imagining!


Sent by Cally

5. 



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Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



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