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Today's jokes [2.21.13]

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A tough case was being argued in court.  The defense attorney,
feeling that he was in trouble, sent the judge a bottle of
hundred-year old brandy.  The defendant was fit to be tied.

"The judge'll kill me.  Trying to bribe him!  We're dead!"

"I don't think so," his attorney told him.  "I sent it in the 
other lawyer's name!"

1. 




    The blind date hadn't been all that great and she was
   relieved the evening was finally over. At her apartment door, he
   suddenly said "Hey! You wanna see my underwear?" Before she could
   respond, he had dropped his pants, right there in the hall, revealing
   that he wasn't wearing any. She glanced down and said, "Nice design,
   does it also come in men's sizes ?


2. 




Have you ever smelled moth balls? 

     - How did you get their little legs apart? 

3. 




Q: Did you hear about the new German microwave oven?
A: It seats 500.

4. 




What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to Pee Wee Herman in their holding cell at
the jail?

"Stop playing with my lunch."

5. 



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Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



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