Today's jokes [12.9.13]
Vote for the joke that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes.
Also, links to joke categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your joke reading.
Dr. Cutter is the local Veterinarian, known for his wry humor. He
surpassed himself one summer day when a city dog was brought to him
after an encounter with a porcupine.
After almost an hour of prying, pulling, cutting and stitching, he
returned the dog to its owner, who asked what she owed.
"Fifteen dollars, Ma'am," he answered.
"Why that's simply outrageous!" she stormed. "That's what's wrong with
you Maine people, you're always trying to over charge summer visitors.
Whatever do you do in the winter, when we're not being gypped here?"
"Raise porcupines, Ma'am."
What does a woman do to her asshole in the morning?
-Sends him to work.
Doctor: We operated on your eyes and we've managed to save one of them.
Patient: Oh, thank you very much.
Doctor: Yes, we'll give it to you on your way out.
Waiter: "How did you find your steak, sir,"?
Young Man: "Quite accidentally, I assure you.
I moved that piece of lettuce and there it was."
A drunk goes into a bar sits down and says hey hey bartender can we
talk about politics
The bartender says ģIF THERE IS ONE THING WE DON'T TALK ABOUT IN HERE
IT'S POLITICSī. A little while later hey bartender can we talk about
religon. Again the
bartender says" IF THERE'S ONE THING WE DON'T TALK ABOUT IN HERE IT'S
RELIGON". Then again we hear hey bartender can we talk about sex. The
SURE. The drunk says good............fuck you!
PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.
By voting you are helping select today's best joke. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best jokes to send in our daily best humor mailing.
Today's StoriesToday's PoemsToday's QuotesToday's Funny Pic
S M T W Th F St
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
8 9 10 11 12 13 14
15 16 17 18 19 20 21
22 23 24 25 26 27 28
29 30 31