Today's jokes [12.11.13]
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As the end of the day drew near, the handsome executive
called his newly hired assistant into his office. "Do you know
what time we quit around here ?" he asked.
"Sure !" the girl nervously giggled. "Whenever somebody
knocks on the door."
Getting anything done around here is like mating elephants.
It's done on a very high level.
There's a lot of stomping and screaming involved.
And it takes two years to get any results.
Q. Why does Mary Lou Retton smile so much?
A. Because she found out what the big boys eat.
I guess some things will never change. I hired a temp while my
secretary was on maternity leave. Trying to arrive at an
agreeable wage, I asked what she expected to earn.
She said, "Well... the minimum I could work for is four
hundred a week."
I told her I'd give her that much with pleasure.
She shook her head and replied, "With pleasure, it'll be $600
On the eve of the couple's tenth wedding anniversary, the still slim
wife was bragging about her figure. "You know honey," she said, "I can
still get into the skirts I had before we were married."
"Yeah ?" the husband replied as he turned his attention back to the
ball game on TV. "I wish to hell I could."
PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.
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