Today's jokes [10.22.13]
Vote for the joke that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes.
Also, links to joke categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your joke reading.
Q: What does a lesbian have in common with a mechanic?
A: Snap-on tools!
Q: What do Kodak cameras have in common with condoms?
A: Both capture the moment.
There was an airplane full of a shipment of Pepsi flying over Africa.
It suddenly had a malfunction and went down. A few weeks later,
PepsiCo sent a rescue plane out to look for the lost plane. They found the
wreckage but were unable to locate the crew. They searched the area
and found a tribe of cannibals. They walked up to the Chief of the tribe
and asked him if he knew anything about the crash. The Chief says,
"Yeah". When asked where the crew was the Chief replied, "We ate the
crew and drank the Pepsi." The Rescue crew was shocked. One man asked,
"Did you eat their legs?" The chief replied, "We ate their legs and we
drank the Pepsi." Another rescuer asked, "Did you eat their arms?" The
Chief said, "We ate their arms, and we drank the Pepsi". After looking
totally perplexed for a minute a third added, "Did you...you
their....things"?? The chief says, "No." "No?" asked the rescuers.
"NO", replied the Chief, " THINGS go better with COKE!!!"
If the bird of wisdom is an owl, and the bird of peace
is the dove, what is the bird of TRUE love?
Sent by Denise
A guy driving a truck in the middle of nowhere picks up a hitch-hiker.
It gets dark and the hitch-hiker falls asleep. Suddenly bang, and the
hitch-hiker wakes up,"what the hell was that?". The truck driver
replies, "some kinda animal, go back to sleep."
Further the same thing again, bang, "What the hell was that?",
"some kinda animal again."
Further into the night, bang, bang, bang, "What the hell was that?",
"Some bastard!". "How terrible",says the hitch-hiker, "but there were
The truck driver replies, "Yeah, well I had to go through two fences
to get the bastard. . ."
PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.
By voting you are helping select today's best joke. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best jokes to send in our daily best humor mailing.
Today's StoriesToday's PoemsToday's QuotesToday's Funny Pic
S M T W Th F St
1 2 3 4 5
6 7 8 9 10 11 12
13 14 15 16 17 18 19
20 21 22 23 24 25 26
27 28 29 30 31