Today's jokes [10.10.13]
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The bartender asks him "What'll you have?". The guy answers,
"A scotch, please". The bartender hands him the drink, and
says "That'll be five dollars", to which he replies "What are
you talking about? I don't owe you anything for this".
A lawyer, sitting nearby and overhearing the conversation,
then says to the bartender, "You know, he's got you there. In
the original offer, which consitutes a binding contract upon
acceptance, there was no stipulation of remuneration". The
bartender's not impressed, but says to the guy, "Okay, you
beat me for a drink. But don't ever let me catch you in here
The next day, same guy walks into the bar. Bartender says,
"What the hell are you doing in here? I can't believe you've
got the audacity to come back!".
The guy says "What are you talking about? I've never been in
this place in my life", to which the bartender replies "I'm
very sorry, but this is uncanny. You must have a double."
To which the guy replies "Thank you! Make it a scotch."
This girl walks in to a doctors office and she asks "Whats a failic symbol?
Doctor says "you're kidding.."
Girl says "no! I don't know! Whats a failic symbol???"
Doctor pulls his pants and underwear down and says "You see? This is a
Girl says "Oh! Its just like a penis, only smaller"
"Cash, check or charge?" I asked after folding items the woman wished to
purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I notice a remote control for a
television set in her purse. "Do you always carry your TV remote?" I
"No," she replied. "But my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I
figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him."
After many months of trying to make ends meet, one California couple
decided that the only way they were going to get any extra cash was to
have the old lady start hooking.
Early the next morning the wife comes home looking very haggard and
worn out. The husband guiltily asks how she did, and the wife replies
that she earned four hundred dollars and ten cents.
"That`s great!" the husband replies. "But who gave you the ten cents?"
"Everybody!" replied the wife.
Why wasn't Jesus born in West Virginia?
Well God found plenty of guys who liked
to deal with sheep, but he could'nt
find three wise men or a virgin.
Sent by Johnny
PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.
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