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Today's quotes [1.28.13]

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"My computer screen says 'Press any key to continue'. Can I borrow your keys?
 Mine are locked in my Yugo..."
                        -- Some Guy (from Dilbert)


My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right. --
       Ashleigh Brilliant


Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to
       calm myself down. I'll go over to the person's house and ring the
       doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you
       know what I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife
       stuck in the side of its head with a note that says "You." After
       that, I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done.


If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell
       him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another
       cute thing to tell him is "probably because of something you did."


"It hasn't gone black yet because my flatmate won't do it for me..."
                        -- Eric Erickson


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