Today's poems [9.19.12]
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There was a young fellow named Simon
Who tried to discover a hymen.
But he found every girl
Had relinguished her pearl
In exchange for a solitaire diamond.
A near-sighted chap named Coulter
Led a glamorous gal to the altar.
Quite lovely he thought her
Till some strong soap and hot water
Made her look like the rock of Gibraltar.
There was a young girl of Spitzbergen
Where people all thought her a virgin
Till they found her in bed
With her quim very red
And the head of a kid just emerging
There was an old spinster of Tyre
Who bellowed, "MY CUNT IS ON FIRE!"
So a fireman was found,
Brought his engine around
And extinguished her burning desire
A young trapeze artist named Bract,
Is faced by a very sad fact.
Imagine his pain,
When again and again,
He catches his wife in the act.
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