Today's jokes [9.7.12]
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Barbara Walters was doing a documentary on the customs of American
Indians. After a
tour of a reservation, she asked a Brave,who had only one feather in
his headdress, "Why
the difference in the number of feathers in the headdresses?" His
reply was, "Me have only
one sqaw, me have only one feather." She asked another Brave, feeling
the first fellow
was only joking. This Brave had four feathers in his headdress. He
replied, "Ugh; me
have four feathers because me sleep with four squaws." Still not
convinced the number of
feathers indicated the number of sqaws involved, she decided to
interview the Chief.
Now the Chief had a headdress full of feathers, which, needless to
say, amused Ms.
Walters. She asked the Chief, "Why do you have so many feathers in
The Chief proudly pounded his chest and said, "Me Chief. Me fuck-em
all. Big, small, fat,
tall. Me fuck-em all." Horrified, Ms. Walters stated, "You ought to be
hung!" The Chief
replied, "You damned right, me hung. Big like buffalo, long like
snake." Ms. Walters
cried, "You don't have to be so goddamned hostile!" The Chief replied,
style, wolf-style, any-style, me fuck-em all!" With tears in her eyes,
Ms. Walters cried,
"Oh dear." The Chief said, "No deer. Me no fuck deer. Asshole too high
and fuckers run
too fast. No fuck deer!"
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Hehe...it doen't matter, it's not going to come anyway!
Sent by Melissa
Why is pubic hair curly?
If it was straight, it would poke your eyes out.
Whats the difference between a bunch of lawyers in a porche
and a porcupine?
- A porcupine has pricks on the outside!
The doctor comes out of the delivery room and says to the father, "I'm
sorry to have to tell you this, Mr. Jones, but apparently your child was
born with no arms, only one leg, and teeth that project six inches out of
Mr. Jones cries, "My God! What will we do with such a deformed baby?"
The doctor says, "Use it as a rake?"
PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.
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