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Today's jokes [9.7.12]

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   Barbara Walters was doing a documentary on the customs of American
   Indians. After a
   tour of a reservation, she asked a Brave,who had only one feather in
   his headdress, "Why
   the difference in the number of feathers in the headdresses?" His
   reply was, "Me have only
   one sqaw, me have only one feather." She asked another Brave, feeling
   the first fellow
   was only joking. This Brave had four feathers in his headdress. He
   replied, "Ugh; me
   have four feathers because me sleep with four squaws." Still not
   convinced the number of
   feathers indicated the number of sqaws involved, she decided to
   interview the Chief.
   Now the Chief had a headdress full of feathers, which, needless to
   say, amused Ms.
   Walters. She asked the Chief, "Why do you have so many feathers in
   your headdress?"
   The Chief proudly pounded his chest and said, "Me Chief. Me fuck-em
   all. Big, small, fat,
   tall. Me fuck-em all." Horrified, Ms. Walters stated, "You ought to be
   hung!" The Chief
   replied, "You damned right, me hung. Big like buffalo, long like
   snake." Ms. Walters
   cried, "You don't have to be so goddamned hostile!" The Chief replied,
   "Hoss-style, dog-
   style, wolf-style, any-style, me fuck-em all!" With tears in her eyes,
   Ms. Walters cried,
   "Oh dear." The Chief said, "No deer. Me no fuck deer. Asshole too high
   and fuckers run
   too fast. No fuck deer!"
   


1. 




What do you call a dog with no legs?

Hehe...it doen't matter, it's not going to come anyway!


Sent by Melissa

2. 




Why is pubic hair curly?

If it was straight, it would poke your eyes out.

3. 




Whats the difference between a bunch of lawyers in a porche
and a porcupine? 

    - A porcupine has pricks on the outside! 

4. 




The doctor comes out of the delivery room and says to the father, "I'm 
sorry to have to tell you this, Mr. Jones, but apparently your child was 
born with no arms, only one leg, and teeth that project six inches out of 
its mouth."

Mr. Jones cries, "My God!  What will we do with such a deformed baby?"

The doctor says, "Use it as a rake?"



5. 



BONUS! A random joke from Jokes2Go database
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Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



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