Today's jokes [9.26.12]
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Did you hear about the queer deaf mute?
- Neither did he.
17 getting to third
25 airplane sex
35 menage a trois
48 taking the company public
66 Swiss maid/Nazi love slave
St. Peter meets Mother Theresa at the Gates Of Heaven and says, "You were
a good woman. I'm giving you a nice halo."
Mother Theresa is walking around Heaven when she sees Princess Di, and the
Princess has a much bigger halo.
Mother Theresa goes back to St. Peter and says, "St. Peter, I spent most
of my adult life helping the poor and the sickly. Princess Di did no where
near the amount of charitable work I did. Why does she have a bigger
St. Peter says, "That's not a halo. That's a steering wheel."
Q: What do you call a hooker with a runny nose?
There's these four Irishmen in a bar, all drinking Guinness. One of them
is looking rather puzzled, so another turns to him and asks him what's the
1st Irishman: Well, I was just trying to remember what 2 plus 2 is.
2nd Irishman: Oh, that's easy, it's 147.
1st Irishman: No no no, that can't be right. How about you, Fergus, do you
know what 2 plus 2 is?
3rd Irishman: Hmmm ... could it be Wednesday, perhaps?
1st Irishman: No no no, that doesn't sound right either. How about you
Pat, do you know?
4th Irishman: Simple, the answer is 4.
1st Irishman: Of course! How did you work it out?!
4th Irishman: Aha, that's where brains come in! I subtracted 147 from
PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.
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