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Today's jokes [8.26.12]

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   A girl was intrigued at the kilt that a Scottsman was wearing,
   wondering what he would be
   wearing underneath. "What's underneath your kilt?", she asked him.
   "Why don't you
   take a look", he replied. Curiosity overcomming her, she lifted the
   kilt.then let it go,"Oh,
   it's gruesome!" "Well, why don't you take another look, it just
   grew-some more."


       Age         FAVORITE FANTASY

        17         tall, dark and handsome
        25         tall, dark and handsome with money
        35         tall, dark and handsome with money and a brain
        48         a man with hair
        66         a man


A young boy, about eight years old, walks into the local
grocery store and picks our a huge box of laundry detergent.
The grocer walked over, and trying to be friendly,
asked the boy if he had a lot of laundry to do.
"Nope, no laundry," the boy said, "I'm going to wash my dog!"
"But you shouldn't use this to wash your dog. It's very
powerful and if you wash your dog in this, he'll get sick.
In fact, it might even kill him."
But the boy was not to be stopped and carried the detergent
to the counter and paid for it, even as the grocer still
tried to talk him out of washing his dog.

About a week later the boy was back in the store to buy some
candy. The grocer asked the boy how his dog was doing.
"Oh, he died," the boy said sadly.
The grocer, trying not to be an I-told-you-so, said he was
sorry the dog died but added, "I tried to tell you not to use
that detergent on your dog!"
"Well," the boy replied, "I don't think it was the detergent
that killed him."
"Oh? What was it then?"
"I think it was the spin cycle!"


What's a Jewish American Princess's idea of kinky sex?

     She moves. 


Q: What is a blonde who died her hair brown?
A: Artificial Intelligence.


BONUS! A random joke from Jokes2Go database
If you don't like it, just hit RELOAD

Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.


PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.

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