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Today's jokes [6.25.12]

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How do you know when your girlfriend is on anabolic steroids?

When she flips you over, holds you down and fucks you
.up the arse with her clitoris.


1. 




   We have a young married couple in the neighborhood who are truly
   inseparable. Last week, it took four Howard County Policemen and a
   dog.


2. 




Father Goose Story No. 1



It seems that there were these 3 pregnant Indian Squaws, all due to give
birth at about the same time.  The first squaw gave birth to a boy, and the
birthing was done on a deer hide.  The 2nd also gave birth to a boy, but this
was done on a bear hide.  And, the third had twins, two boys, and
she did this on a hippopotamus hide.

This means that the sons of the squaw on the hippopotamus hide
is equal to the sons of the squaws on the other two hides.



3. 




The little darlings were all in their seats on the first day of school and 
their new teacher introduced herself. She wrote on the board that her name 
is Ms. Prussy and the day passed without any further incidents. 

The next morning after greeting the class she asked if anyone remembered 
her name and little johnny waved frantically. The teacher taken by his 
enthusiasm called on him. In a timid voice he said "Miss Crunt?"

4. 




A mother was reading a book about animals to her 3 year old daughter.
Mother: "What does the cow say?"
Child: "Moooo!"
Mother: "Great! What does the cat say?"
Child: "Meow."
Mother: "Oh, you're so smart! What does the frog say?" And this wide-eyed 
little three-year-old looked up at her mother and replied, "Bud."



5. 



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Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



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