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Today's quotes [5.16.12]

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Once at a social gathering, Gladstone said to Disraeli, "I predict,
   Sir, that you will die either by hanging or of some vile disease".
   Disraeli replied, "That all depends, sir, upon whether I embrace your
   principles or your mistress."


1. 




"Will administer ISO 9000 and year 2000 certification tests for food."
                        -- Simon Slavin


2. 




If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the
other trees make fun of it?

3. 




It's not hard to tell we was poor --
when you saw the toilet paper dryin' on the clothesline. 

     - George Lindsey 

4. 




When the age of the Vikings came to a close, they must have sensed
       it. Probably, they gathered together one evening, slapped each
       other on the back and said, "Hey, good job."


5. 



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