Today's jokes [4.7.12]
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What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Sent by rob
One night Bill Clinton was awakened by George Washington's ghost in the
White House. "George, what is the best thing I could do to help the
country?" Clinton asked.
"Set an honest and honorable example, just as I did," advised George.
The next night the ghost of Thomas Jefferson moved through the dark
bedroom. "Tom, what is the best thing I could do to help the country?"
"Cut taxes and reduce the size of government," advised Tom.
Clinton didn't sleep well the next night, and saw yet another figure
moving in the shadows. It was Abraham Lincoln's ghost. "Abe, what is the
best thing I could do to help the country?" Clinton asked.
Abe replied, "Go to the theater."
Stick your tongue out.
Move it up and down.
Now move it left and right.
Well done! You have now completed Christopher Reeves workout video.
A little boy walks up to his father and says, "Dad, what does a pussy
Father responds, "well son, before or after sex?"
Son, "Well, before?"
Father, "picture a tulip with all the petals son."
Son, "well what about after?"
Father, "Picture a bull dog eating mayonnaise!"
Q: What was the last thing to go through Cobain's mind?
A: The roof of his mouth.
PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.
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