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Today's stories [11.2.12]

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A true story.  A thermodynamics professor had written a take home exam
for his graduate students.  It had one question:

"Is hell exothermic or endothermic?  Support your answer with a
proof."

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law
or some variant.  One student, however wrote the following:

First, we postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some
mass.

If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass.  So, at what
rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving?  I
think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it
will not leave.  Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for souls entering hell, lets look at the different religions that
exist in the world today.  Some of these religions state that if you
are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell.  Since, there
are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more
than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to
hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of
souls in hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law
states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay
the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay
constant.

So, if hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase
until all hell breaks loose.

Of course, if hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of
souls in hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until hell
freezes over.

It was not revealed what grade the student got.

Tad Cook
tad@ssc.com



1. 




[AP, Mammoth Lakes, CA] A San Anselmo man
   died yesterday when he hit a lift tower at the
   Mammoth mountain ski area while riding down the
   slope on a foam pad, authorities said. Matthew
   David Hubal, 22, was pronounced dead at Centinela
   Mammoth Hospital. The accident occurred about 3
   a.m. The Mono County Sheriff's Department said
   Hubal and his friends had apparently hiked up a
   ski run called Stump Alley and undid some yellow
   foam protectors from the lift towers. Lieutenant
   Mike Donnelly of the Mammoth Lakes Police
   Department said the pads are used to protect
   skiers who might hit the towers. The group
   apparently used the pads to slide down the ski
   slope and Hubal crashed into a tower. It has
   since been investigated that the tower he hit was
   the one with its pad removed.


2. 




[AP,St. Louis, MO] Robert Puelo, 32, was
   apparently being disorderly in a St. Louis market.
   When the clerk threatened to call police, Puelo
   grabbed a hot dog, shoved it in his mouth, and
   walked out without paying for it. Police later
   found him unconscious in front of the store:
   paramedics removed the six-inch wiener from his
   throat, Where it had choked him to death.


3. 



BONUS! A random story from Jokes2Go database
If you don't like it, just hit RELOAD




This guy was playing a game of texas holdem poker and had already lost 300 dollars when suddenly he looked down, and just next to the table he sees a little green leprechaun.
"Jus quit playing poker right now and I will give you a million dollars worth in a pot full of gold said the little green gentlemen.
The player replied, sure "just Let me get even first."


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