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Today's jokes [10.26.12]

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A guy is screwing a great looking blonde. 
The girl asks, "You haven't got AIDS have you?" 
He replies, "No." 
She responds, "Oh, thank heavens for that!!
I don't want to get that again...!"

1. 




When this guy heard that the Pope was coming to town, he went
out and bought a tuxedo in the hope that the Pope might notice
him on the parade route. When he went to the parade, there was
this bum standing next to him, with old, dirty clothes on. The
the guy's amazement, when the Pope came, he went over to the
bum, and whispered something in his ear. Enraged, the guy went
over to the bum and offered him $100 for the clothes off his
back. Next day, he went back to the parade dressed like a bum.
Sure enough, when the Pope came, he stopped in front of this
guy, and whispered in his ear, "I thought I told you to get
the hell out of here!"

2. 




(Q) Why don't blondes use vibrators?
 
(A) Because they are scared they might chip thier teeth!!!

Sent by T.L.Glenn

3. 




How to Hunt Elephants -- Senior Manager Style

Senior managers set broad elephant hunting policy based on
the assumption that elephants are just like field mice, but
with deeper voices.
 
Sent by Alex

4. 




Q: What do you get when a blond stands on here head?
A: A smelly burnette.

Sent by Tiffany

5. 



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Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



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