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Today's quotes [1.23.12]

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"From the moment I picked your book up until I put it down I was convulsed
 with laughter. Some day I intend reading it."
                        -- Groucho Marx, from "The Book of Insults"


1. 




Heaven is where the police are British, the cooks are French, the
       mechanics German, the lovers Italian and it's all organised by the
       Swiss. Hell is where the chefs are British, the mechanics French,
       the lover's Swiss, the police German and it's all organised by the
       Italians.


2. 




Women's creed: Men are like linoleum. If you lay them right the
       first time, you can walk on them for 20 years.


3. 




               No labour bestowed upon a worthless thing can be productive
               of fruit; even by a hundred efforts a crane cannot be made  
               to talk like a parrot.                                      

                                             The Hitopadesa (600?-1100? A.D.)



4. 




If you love something, set it free. If it returns to you, it's yours
forever. If it doesn't, it wasn't yours to begin with.



5. 



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