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Today's quotes [1.21.12]

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To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kind of scary. I've
       wondered where this started, and I think it goes back to the time
       I went to the circus, and a clown killed my dad.


1. 




One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to
       take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an
       old burned-out warehouse. "Oh, no," I said, "Disneyland burned
       down." He cried and cried, but I think deep down he thought it was
       a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real
       Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late.


2. 




I saw on this nature show how the male elk douses himself with
       urine to smell sweeter to the opposite sex. What a coincidence!


3. 




Christian: One who believes that the New Testament is a divinely
       inspired book that is admirably suited to the spiritual needs of
       his neighbour.


4. 




"From what we get, we can make a living; what we give, however,
       makes a life." -- Arthur Ashe


5. 



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