Today's jokes [1.2.12] Vote for the joke that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to joke categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your joke reading.
What do you get when you cross a Rooster with an owl? A Cock that can stay up all night!!
This is, like, so dumb... Instructions on how to Colect a Beaker of Cat's Urine 1.Treat the beaker like your most prized possession. 2.Solemnly intone the word "no" every time the cat approaches the beaker. 3.After completing steps #1 and #2, leave the cat alone with the beaker for thirty seconds.
There's a student in medical school who wants to specialize in sexual disorders, so he makes arrangements to visit the sexual disorder clinic. The chief doctor is showing him around, discussing cases and the facility, when the student sees a patient masturbating right there in the hallway. "What condition does he have?" the student asks. "He suffers from Seminal Buildup Disorder," the doctor replies. "If he doesn't obtain sexual release forty to fifty times a day, he'll pass into a coma." The student takes some notes on that, and they continue down the hall. As they turn the corner, he sees another patient with his pants around his ankles, receiving oral sex from a beautiful nurse. "What about him?" the student asks. "What's his story?" "Oh, it's the same condition," the doctor replies. "He just has a better health plan."
The local priest came across Paddy who had stumbled out of the town tavern. "Paddy," he said, " I'm afraid I'll not be seeing you in Heaven one day." "Really, Father?" slurred Paddy. "What have you done?"
Two gay men were in bed fooling around when all of a sudden the door bell rings. The first gay man tells the second, "Don't cum until I come back", and he rushes off to answer the door. After a few minutes, he eagerly returns to the bedroom only to find cum was all over the bed and sheets. He says to the second gay man, "I thought you wasn't going to cum until I came back. The second gay man says to the first, "I didn't cum, ........I farted! Sent by Ken "C"
Love, Mary
PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.
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