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Today's quotes [9.25.11]

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The people of England are never so happy as when you tell them
they are ruined.
        --Arthur Murphy, 1758

1. 




"*slap*"
"When she does that you're meant to say 'harder'..."
"Harder... but only if she ties me up..."
                        -- Debra Langeluddecke, me, Richard White


2. 




When I heated my home with oil, I used an average of 800 gallons
a year. I have found that I can keep comfortably warm for an
entire winter with slightly over half that quantity of beer. 

     - Postpetroleum Guzzler, Dave Barry 

3. 




Rain - something that, when you take an umbrella, it
doesn't.

4. 




Olin Miller: 
     "You probably wouldn't worry about what people think of you if
you could know how seldom they do."

5. 



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