Today's jokes [9.15.11]
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Q: What's a Jewish American Princess' favorite position?
A: Facing Bloomingdales
What has a woman got in common with a box of Kentucky Fried Chicken?
Once you get past the tender breast and the juicy thigh, all you're left
with is a greasy box.
A guy walks into an elevator and stands next to a beautiful woman.
After a few minutes he turns to her and says, "Can I smell your pussy?"
The woman looks at him in disgust and says, "Certainly not!"
"Hmmm," he replies. "It must be your feet, then."
A guy walks into a pet store wanting a parrot. The store clerk shows him
two beautiful ones out on the floor. "This one's $5,000 and the other is
$10,000." the clerk said.
"Wow! What does the $5,000 one do?"
"This parrot can sing every aria Mozart ever wrote."
"And the other?" said the customer.
"This one can sing Wagner's entire Ring cycle. There's another one in
the back room for $30,000."
"Holy moly! What does that one do?"
"Nothing that I can tell, but the other two parrots call him 'Maestro'."
Young man Murphy applied for an engineering position at an
Irish firm based in Dublin. An American applied for the same
job and both applicants having the same qualifications were
asked to take a test by the Department manager.
Upon completion of the test both men only missed one of the
questions. The manager went to Murphy and said, "Thank you
for your interest, but we've decided to give the American the
Murphy: "And why would you be doing that? We both got 9
questions correct. This being Ireland and me being Irish I
should get the job!"
Manager: "We have made our decision not on the correct
answers, but on the question you missed."
Murphy: "And just how would one incorrect answer be better
than the other?"
Manager: "Simple. The American put down on question # 5, 'I
don't know.' You put down 'Neither do I.'"
PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.
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