Today's jokes [8.11.11]
Vote for the joke that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes.
Also, links to joke categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your joke reading.
A young girl had not been feeling well and went to her family doctor.
"Young lady," said
the doctor, "you're pregnant." "But that can't be. The only men I've
been with are nudists
and in our colony we practise sex only with our eyes." "Well my dear,"
said the doctor,
"someone in that colony is cockeyed."
Drive carefully. 90% of the people on the road are caused by accident.
On the grave of Ezekial Aikle in East Dalhousie Cemetery, Nova Scotia:
The Good Die Young.
If Hewlett-Packard made toasters...
They would market the Reverse Polish Toaster,
which takes in toast and gives you regular bread.
A man enters a barber shop for a shave. While the barber is
foaming him up, he mentions the problems he has getting a
close shave around the cheeks.
"I have just the thing," says the barber taking a small
wooden ball from a nearby drawer. "Just place this between
your cheek and gum."
The client places the ball in his mouth and the barber
proceeds with the closest shave the man has ever experienced.
After a few strokes the client asks in garbled speech.
"And what if I swallow it?"
"No problem," says the barber. "Just bring it back tomorrow
like everyone else does."
PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.
By voting you are helping select today's best joke. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best jokes to send in our daily best humor mailing.
Today's StoriesToday's PoemsToday's QuotesToday's Funny Pic
S M T W Th F St
1 2 3 4 5 6
7 8 9 10 11 12 13
14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27
28 29 30 31