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Today's stories [7.28.11]

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Lady Golfer

I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was 
unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several 
minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works 
at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at 
him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls."


1. 




My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a
variety of nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy
behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I'm
just looking at your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically,
the boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day,
my sister has never let me forget.


2. 




While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release
some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her 
after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told 
her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished. 
To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as 
threatening, "If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that
I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!" The silence was deafening 
after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were 
doing.
I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my
daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me
were screams of laughter.

3. 



BONUS! A random story from Jokes2Go database
If you don't like it, just hit RELOAD




This guy was playing a game of texas holdem poker and had already lost 300 dollars when suddenly he looked down, and just next to the table he sees a little green leprechaun.
"Jus quit playing poker right now and I will give you a million dollars worth in a pot full of gold said the little green gentlemen.
The player replied, sure "just Let me get even first."


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