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Today's jokes [7.30.11]

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Back in the 1960's white activists often got their hair styled in
an afro -- a large bush-style hairdoo -- to show support for civil
rights.
One such fellow did so, and arrived home smiling and announced
that he'd also teased all his pubic hair into the same bushy style.
His wife, who had had it with her spouse's endless posturing, 
sneered, "Great... just great... now during foreplay I'll have
to look for a needle in a haystack."

1. 




What is the only time a man thinks about a candlelight dinner?

When the power goes off.



2. 




Two men are approaching each other on a sidewalk. Both are dragging
their right foot as the walk. As they meet, one man looks at the other
knowingly, points at his foot and says, "Vietnam, 1969." 
     The other hooks his thumb behind him and says, "Dog shit, 20 feet
back." 

3. 




Two children are in a doctor's waiting room, and one of them is crying. 
"Why are you crying?" asked the other child. 
"I'm here for a blood test, and they're going to cut my finger." 
When he heard this, the other child started to cry. 
"Why are you crying?" 
"I'm here for a urine test."

4. 




   A man was driving down a quiet country lane when out into the road
   strayed a rooster. Whack! The rooster disappeared under the car in a
   cloud of feathers.
   
   Shaken, the man pulled over at the farmhouse and rang the doorbell. A
   farmer appeared. The man somewhat nervously said, "I think I killed
   your rooster, please allow me to replace him."
   
   "Suit yourself," the farmer replied, "the hens are round the back."
   


5. 



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Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



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