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Today's jokes [7.17.11]

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A man suspected his wife of seeing another man.
So, he hired a famous Chinese detective,
Ram Pam Sim Wimm, to watch and report any
activities that might develop.  A few days later,
he received this report:

  Most honorable sir:
  You leave house.
  He come house.
  I watch.
  He and she leave house.
  I follow.
  He and she get on train.
  I follow.
  He and she go in hotel.
  I climb tree-look in window.
  He kiss she.
  She kiss he.
  He strip she.
  She strip he.
  He play with she.
  She play with he.
  I play with me.
  Fall out of tree, not see.
  No Fee.

Sent by Marina

1. 




Q: What do Israeli soldiers do when they get bored?
A: They go over to the West Bank & the Gaza Strip and get stoned.

2. 




A guy rings work and says "I can`t come in to work today as I`m sick"
The voice at the other end asks "How sick are you ??"
The guy says "Well I`m in bed with my 12 year old son !!"

3. 




A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for
something to eat. He came across two men. One was sitting
under a tree and reading a book; the other was typing
away on his typewriter. The lion quickly pounced on the
man reading the book and devoured him. Even the king of
the jungle knows that readers digest and writers cramp. 

4. 




Q. What does it mean when two lesbians make love?

A. It doesn't mean dick.

5. 



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Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



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