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Today's stories [6.18.11]

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Grand National winning jockey Mick Fitzgerald: "Sex is an anti-climax
after that!"
Desmond Lynam: "Well, you gave the horse a wonderful ride, everyone
saw that."
(BBC)

1. 




She got so technophobic that [when] I gave her a digital
alarm clock for Christmas, she gave it back to me. 
          -- President Clinton, from his speech on Y2K in 
December 1998 in which he describes Hillary's request for a
wind-up clock that won't fail on Jan. 1, 2000.

2. 




Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an 
hour east of Bakersfield, blonde new to boating was having aproblem.
No matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't get her brand new 
22-ft Bayliner to perform.  It wouldn't get on a plane at all, and it 
was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power 
she applied.
After about an hour of trying to make it go, she putted over to a 
nearby marina. Maybe they could tell her what was wrong. A thorough 
topside check revealed everything was in perfect working order. The 
engine ran fine, the outdrive went up and down, the prop was the 
correct size and pitch.
So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath.
He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard. Under the boat, 
still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.

3. 



BONUS! A random story from Jokes2Go database
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This guy was playing a game of texas holdem poker and had already lost 300 dollars when suddenly he looked down, and just next to the table he sees a little green leprechaun.
"Jus quit playing poker right now and I will give you a million dollars worth in a pot full of gold said the little green gentlemen.
The player replied, sure "just Let me get even first."


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