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Today's jokes [6.10.11]

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Two blondes are passing by a fruit shop when the grocer calls to 
them, "Bananas! 50 cents each or three for a dollar!"

The girls stop and look at each other. "Well I suppose we could always 
eat the third one!"

1. 




What is the difference between roast beef and pea soup? 

Eveybody can roast beef.

2. 




Do you know what happens if you don't pay your exorcist?

You get repossessed!

3. 




What are the three fastest means of communication?

Internet 
Telephone 
Telawoman!

4. 




There's an elderly man and woman sitting in the sunroom of a retirement 
home. The old man says to the woman, "For five dollars, I'll have sex 
with you on that rocking chair over there. For ten dollars, I'll have sex 
with you on that couch. But for twenty dollars, I'll take you to my room, 
light a few candles and give you a romantic evening of passion you'll 
never forget."

The woman considers it a moment and then, after fishing through her 
purse, produces a twenty dollar bill. The man says, "So, you want the 
romantic night in my room, eh?" 

The woman replies, "No, I want four times in the rocker."

5. 



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Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



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