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Today's quotes [5.20.11]

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"Disappointment doesn't kill."
"Yeah, rejection kills. Disappointment only maims."
                        -- Noelle, Abby, "The Truth about Cats and Dogs"


1. 




Beginning in February 1976 your assistance benefits will be
   discontinued... Reason: it has been reported to our office that you
   expired on January 1, 1976.
   -- Letter from the Illinois Department of Public Aid


2. 




"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but
       wish we didn't." -- Erica Jong


3. 




I plugged my phone in where the blender used to be.  I called someone.  They
went "Aaaaahhhh..."


4. 




"Welcome to President Bush, Mrs. Bush, and my fellow astronauts." 

    - J. Danforth Quayle, former U.S. Vice-President 

5. 



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