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Today's jokes [5.26.11]

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Why did the blonde crash her plane when landing?

Because the runway was only 25ft long, but a mile wide.

1. 




Why don't oysters give to charity?

Because they're shellfish.

2. 




How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One, but for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.

3. 




An old lady owned two monkeys. One day they both died,
so she took them to the taxodermist.

"So you want them mounted?" asked the taxidermist.

To which she replied: "No. Holding hands will do just fine."

4. 




How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to change it, and another one to change it back again.

5. 



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Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



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