Today's poems [4.6.11]
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There was a young girl named Dalrymple
Whose sexual equipment was so simple
That on examination they found
Little more than a mound
In the center of which was a dimple.
There was a young fellow named Perkin
Who was always jerkin' his gherkin.
His wife said, "Now, Perkin,
Stop jerkin' your gherkin:
You're shirkin' your ferkin'---you bastard!"
A pathetic appellant at Reno
Was as chaste as the holy Bambino,
For she'd married a slicker
Who stuck to his liquor
And scorned her ripe maraschino
There was a young fellow named Goff
Whose amusement was jacking it off
He pulled it so hard
It stretched out a yard.
And turned to bright blue and fell off.
There was a young girl from Peru
Who badly wanted to screw.
She tried a broom-handle
And the end of a candle,
But threw them away for a Jew.
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