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Today's poems [4.14.11]

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There was an old maid from Bermuda 
               Who shot a marauding intruder. 
                    It was not her ire 
                    At his lack of attire, 
               But he reached for her jewels as he screwed her. 

1. 




There was a young man of Newminster Court 
            Bugger'd a pig, but his prick was too short. 
                Said the hog, "It's not nice, 
                But pray take my advice: 
            Make tracks, or by the police you'll be caught."

2. 




There was a young man named O'Malley 
            Who was fucking his gal in the alley, 
                When right at the start 
                Whe let a small fart, 
            Said O'Malley to Sally, "Now r'ally!" 

3. 




There was a young lady named Sue 
            Who preferred a stiff drink to a screw. 
                But one leads to the other, 
                And now she's a mother--- 
            Let this be a lesson to you. 

4. 




There once was a Vassar B.A. 
               Who pondered the problem all day 
                    Of what there would be 
                    If C-U-N-T 
               Were divided by C-O-C-K. 

5. 



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