Today's Jokes  |  Archives  |  Lists  |  Random  |  Register  |  RandJoke on Your Page  
 


Today's jokes [12.17.11]

Vote for the joke that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to joke categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your joke reading.


A man takes his dog for a walk in the park. While he's there, he runs in 
to his old friend. The two men stop to talk and the dog just plops right 
down and starts licking his balls. The friend sees this and says, "Man, I 
sure wish I could do that." The dog owner says, "Go ahead, but pet him a 
little bit first."



1. 




   A man comes home from a tough day of work looking to unwind. After a
   relaxing dinner with his wife, they retire to bed. So, both go to
   their separate beds, however the man was not yet ready to slumber.
   
   The man calls over to his wife, "My little boopey-boo, I'm lonely."
   
   So the woman gets out of bed and crosses the room to the husband. On
   the way she trips on the carpet and falls on her face.
   
   The husband with a concerned look on his face says, "Oh, did my little
   honey-woney fall on her little nosey-wosey?"
   
   The woman gets up and enters the man's bed. The two have passionate
   sex and afterwards the woman rolls out. As she returns to her bed, she
   once again catches her foot on the carpet and falls flat on her face.
   
   The man looks over his shoulder at his wife lying on the floor and
   says, "clumsy bitch".
   


2. 




Whats black and white and red all over?

A nun in a car accident.

3. 




Two men were changing in the locker room after a game of tennis. One 
notices the other one is putting on pair of stockings and suspenders.
He says "When did you start wearing them?" To which the other man 
replies "Since my wife found a pair on the back seat of the car."

4. 




What do you get when you cross a Jehovah's Witness and an atheist?

Someone who knocks on your door for no reason whatsoever.
If God is dead, then what are they giving out at communion?

5. 



BONUS! A random joke from Jokes2Go database
If you don't like it, just hit RELOAD




Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



By voting you are helping select today's best joke. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best jokes to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read

Today's Stories
Today's Poems
Today's Quotes
Today's Funny Pic

 December '11 Jokes Issues:
S  M  T  W  Th F  St
            1  2  3  
4  5  6  7  8  9  10 
11 12 13 14 15 16 17 
18 19 20 21 22 23 24 
25 26 27 28 29 30 31 

Jump to  



For any questions or comments email us at info@jokes2go.com
Copyright© SpekGY, Inc, 1998-2016. All rights reserved.