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Today's stories [11.4.11]

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Overheard on the elevator: 

    "Their marriage was going O.K. until they bought a water bed... then they started
    drifting apart." 

1. 




Old Simpson was a constant thorn in the side of the Parent-Teachers
Association, with his steadfast opposition to innovation. For one
thing, he was vociferously against the introduction of foreign
languages in the town's junior high school curriculum.
Waving his Bible high in the air, he shouted, "If English was good
enough for the prophets and the apostles, it's plenty good enough
for me." 

2. 




I was sitting behind a car at a stop light the other day and I noticed that
it had a bumper sticker that read "Honk if you love Jesus". So I thought
about it a bit and since I loved Jesus, I honked my horn.

I was very suprised when the driver of the car got out and yelled, "The
light is still red you asshole!!!!" got back in the car and drove off
through the light which had just turned green. 

3. 



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This guy was playing a game of texas holdem poker and had already lost 300 dollars when suddenly he looked down, and just next to the table he sees a little green leprechaun.
"Jus quit playing poker right now and I will give you a million dollars worth in a pot full of gold said the little green gentlemen.
The player replied, sure "just Let me get even first."


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