Today's jokes [10.27.11]
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The blind daters had really hit it off and, at the end of the evening
as they were beginning to undress each other in his apartment, the
fellow said, "Before we go any further, Charlene, tell me - do you
have any special fetishes that I should take into account in bed?"
"As a matter of fact," smiled the girl, "I do happen to have a foot
fetish - but I suppose I'd settle for maybe seven or eight inches."
One day in class the teacher has sex education.On the black board she draws
a penis then asks the class if any of them knows what it is.In the back of
the room,Dirty Johnny stands and says "That's a penis,and my father has two
of them". The teacher looks surprised and asks "What do you mean,two?"Dirty
Johnny responds,"A little one to pee,and a big one to brush the baby sitters
Following a bitter divorce a husband saw his wife at a party and
sneered, "You know, I was a fool when I married you."
The wife simply sighed and replied, "Yes, dear, I know, but I was in
love and didn't really notice."
On visting a seriously ill lawyer in the hospital, his friend found him
sitting up in the bed, frantically leafing through the bible "What are
you doing?" asked the friend. "Looking for loopholes," repied the lawyer.
The teacher walks in and finds an apple on her desk with the letters "ILU"
written on it. The teacher asks who left it. A little white girl raises
her hand. Well sweetie, what does "ILU" mean? The little girl replies, "I
The teacher says, "Isn't that sweet," and continues with class. The next
day the teacher finds a banana on her desk with the letters "YAS" written
on it. The teacher asks who left and what does it mean. A little white boy
raises his hand and says, "It means, You are special." "Thank you
sweetheart", the teacher says.
The following day, the teacher walks in to find a watermelon with the
letters "FUCK" written on it. The enraged teacher asks who left it and if
they know what that means. A little black girl raises her hand and
cheerfully says, "Yes maam, I left it. It means, from us colored kids!".
PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.
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