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Today's stories [8.1.10]

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A lady who was known as Churchill's main rival in parliament was giving a 
speech. Churchill, with his usual enthusiasm for his rival, dozed off 
while the lady was speaking. She stopped her speech and awoke Sir Winston 
by yelling, "Mr. Churchill, must you sleep while I talk?" Churchill 
sleepily replied, "No, ma'am. I do so purely by choice."

1. 




At one job I had, the boss man got the idea that the IT
department should be living up to the slogan, "Giving every
user what they need."

I politely requested, "How do we get them to turn around so
we can kick them in the ass?" It went over quite well, the room
fell out laughing. I don't work there any more.


2. 




I was playing in a night club, and getting few requests and small tips. 
Towards the end of the night, a man walked up with a wad of bills in his 
hand and asked me to play a jazz chord. I played an Amaj7. 

He said, "No, no. A jazz chord." 

I did a little improvisational thing, but he didn't like that either. 

"No, no, no! A jazz chord. You know, 'A jazz chord, to say, ah love you.'" 



3. 



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This guy was playing a game of texas holdem poker and had already lost 300 dollars when suddenly he looked down, and just next to the table he sees a little green leprechaun.
"Jus quit playing poker right now and I will give you a million dollars worth in a pot full of gold said the little green gentlemen.
The player replied, sure "just Let me get even first."


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