Today's Jokes  |  Archives  |  Lists  |  Random  |  Register  |  RandJoke on Your Page  
 


Today's quotes [7.20.10]

Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to quote categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.


Lisa:  Why are you dedicating your life to blasphemy? 
Homer: Don't worry, sweetheart.  If I'm wrong, I'll recant on my deathbed. 
   -- Always have a backup plan, ``Homer the Heretic'' 

1. 




"10 ways to stop users mistaking you for a normal person (4): When booting a
 workstation, shout out all console output 1/2 a second before it appears.
 Do this with your eyes closed and fists clenched."

-- Steve Mitchell in alt.sysadmin.recovery


2. 




ON RELIGIOUS PRACTICES
   Photons have mass? I didn't know they were catholic!


3. 




We sometimes meet an original gentleman,
        who, if manners had not existed, would have
        invented them.
                                        -- Ralph Waldo Emerson



4. 




A conference is a gathering of important people who singly can do
   nothing, but together can decide that nothing can be done.
         Fred Allen


5. 



BONUS! A random quote from Jokes2Go database
If you don't like it, just hit RELOAD





By voting you are helping select today's best quote. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best quotes to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read

Today's Jokes
Today's Stories
Today's Poems
Today's Funny Pic

 July '10 Quotes Issues:
S  M  T  W  Th F  St
            1  2  3  
4  5  6  7  8  9  10 
11 12 13 14 15 16 17 
18 19 20 21 22 23 24 
25 26 27 28 29 30 31 

Jump to  



For any questions or comments email us at info@jokes2go.com
Copyright© SpekGY, Inc, 1998-2016. All rights reserved.