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Today's poems [6.8.10]

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There was an old gent from Kentuck 
            Who boasted a filigreed schmuck, 
                But he put it away 
                For fear that one day 
            He might put it in and get stuck. 

1. 




As Apollo was chasing the fair 
               Daphne she vanished in air. 
                    He could find but a shrub 
                    With thick bark on the hub 
               And not even a knot-hole to spare. 

2. 




There was an old maid from Bermuda 
               Who shot a marauding intruder. 
                    It was not her ire 
                    At his lack of attire, 
               But he reached for her jewels as he screwed her. 

3. 




There was a young man of Newminster Court 
            Bugger'd a pig, but his prick was too short. 
                Said the hog, "It's not nice, 
                But pray take my advice: 
            Make tracks, or by the police you'll be caught."

4. 




A wonderful fish is the flea, 
            He bores and he bites on me. 
                I would love, indeed, 
                To watch him feed, 
            But he bites me where I cannot see. 

5. 



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