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Today's jokes [5.10.10]

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A girl from Texas and a girl from New York were seated side
by side on an airplane. The girl from Texas, being friendly
and all, said: "So, where y'all from?" 
The New York girl said, "From a place where they know better
than to use a preposition at the end of a sentence." 
The girl from Texas sat quietly for a few moments and then
replied: "So, where y'all from, bitch?"

1. 




David Copperfield is doing his magic show and asks if anyone would like to
show him a trick. 
"I will", replies a guy in the audience, "but I'm going to need your wife 
Claudia and a table." 
"Ok", says David and the guy gets on stage.
He then bends Claudia over the table, pulls down her knickers and starts
fucking her from behind. David is now very pissed off and says, 
"That isn't a trick!!!"
The guy just looks at David Copperfield and replies,
"I know, it's fucking magic."

2. 




The three wise men are out for a stroll when they come across a stable. 
The three of them decide to duck inside.
On the way in one of the wise men hits his head on the low entranceway. 
"Jesus Christ!" he says.
Joseph says, "Quick, Mary, write that down! It's a hell of a lot better 
than Clyde!"

3. 




Q: Why are bachelors thin, and married men fat?
A: Bachelors come home, check to see what's in the fridge, and go to bed.
.Married men come home, check to see what's in the bed, and go the 
fridge.


4. 




One day a boy and his father were at the dining room table
working on the boy's Social Studies homework, the chapter
about government. The boy turns to his father and asks,
"Dad, how many people work in the U.S. government?"
The father replies without hesitating, "Oh, about ten percent."

5. 



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