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Today's poems [4.26.10]

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There was once a sad Maitre d'hotel 
            Who said, "They can all go to hell! 
                What they do to my wife--- 
                Why it ruins my life; 
            And the worst is, they all do it well." 


There once was a man named Houdini,
Who spilled some Gin on his weenie.
Said his date, "How uncouth!".
So he poured on some Vermouth,
And slipped the young girl a martini!

Sent by NINA


               There was a young fellow named Gluck 
               Who found himself shit out of luck. 
                    Though he petted and wooed, 
                    When he tried to get screwed 
               He found virgins just don't give a fuck. 


Part 6 of 12
                    Spurred on by a very high wager
                    With an envious German named Bager,
                            He'd proceeded to fart
                            The complete oboe part
                    Of a Hayden Octet in B-Major.


                    A certain young man of St. Paul
                    Consistently practiced withdrawal.
                            This quaint predilection
                            Created such friction,
                    He soon had no foreskin at all.


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