Today's poems [3.22.10]

Vote for the poem that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to poem categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your poem reading.

There was a young lady of Kent
Who said that she knew what it meant
When men asked her to dine,
And served cocktails and wine;
She knew what it meant - but she went!

There once was a pious young priest
Who lived almost wholly on yest
"For", he said, "It's plain,
We must all rise again,
And I want to get started at least"

A virile young man of Touraine 
               Had vesicles no one could drain. 
                    With an unbroken flow 
                    Thrice the course he would go, 
               Then roll over and start in again. 

            Have you heard of the Widow O'Riley 
            Who esteemed her late husband so highly 
                That in spite of the scandal, 
                Her umbrella handle 
            Was made of his membrum virile. 

Dirty Old Hag



Here's to Mag that dirty old hag,
That slick and slimy old bitch,
From her nose green matter flows,
And from her toes green maggots grow.
Before I climb those scaly legs
And chew those festered tits,
I'll drink three quarts of drunkard's puke
and die with the drizzled shits.

By voting you are helping select today's best poem. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best poems to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read Today's Jokes Today's Stories Today's Quotes Today's Funny Pic   March '10 Poems Issues: S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31