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Today's poems [3.12.10]

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There once was a young man from Virtualand, 
               Who traded real life for a wedding band, 
                    He signed onto the net, 
                    His betrothed got upset, 
               And she lopped off his link @ the ampersand. 

1. 




A Limerick gets laughs anatomical
Into space that is quite economical.
But the good ones I've seen
So seldom are clean,
And the clean ones so seldom are comical.

2. 




There was a young girl named Dalrymple 
               Whose sexual needs were so simple. 
                    She enjoyed the full spasm 
                    Of a perfect orgasm 
               By frigging herself on a pimple. 

3. 




                    A hermit who had an oasis
                            
                    Thought it the best of all places:
                            He could pray and be calm
                            'Neath a pleasant date-palm,
                            
                    While the lice on his ballocks ran races.
                            
                                              


4. 




A lawyer who was a newlywed groom
Took his bride to their honeymoon room
But they talked the whole night
As to who had the right
To do what, with which, and to whom. 

5. 



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