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Today's jokes [3.9.10]

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What's the object of a Jewish football game?

To get the quarter back!


"Why do you look so glum today?", the teacher asked young Johnny. 
"I didn't have no breakfast," Johnny mumbled. 
"You poor dear," said the teacher. "Now, to return to our geography 
lesson, Johnny, where is the French border?" 
"In bed with my mom. That's why I didn't have no breakfast." 


Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals


What is George W. Bush's favorite town in Texas?



The teacher says, "Children, today I will ask each of you to come to the 
front of the class and use a word in a sentence. Today's word is 
"beautiful". Little Sally, would you please come up here and use 
"beautiful" in a sentence?" Little Sally walked to the front of the room, 
thought for a moment and said, "Teacher, my mom is the most beautiful 
woman in the world." Teacher says, "Very good, Little Sally, you may sit. 
Little Frankie, your turn." Little Frankie walked to the front of the 
room, thought for a moment and said, "Teacher, the sunrise this morning
was the most beautiful sunrise I have ever seen." Teacher says, "Very 
good, Little Frankie, you may sit. Little Johnny, it's your turn." Little 
Johnnie walked to the front of the room, thought for a moment and said, 
"Teacher, last night my big sister told my dad that she was pregnant and 
he said, "Beautiful, just fucking beautiful." 


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