Today's jokes [3.20.10]

Vote for the joke that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to joke categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your joke reading.

"Was your wife a virgin when you married?"

"I don't know. Some say yes. Some say no."

Q: What do you do with 365 used rubbers?
A: Make a tire and call it a good year.

   A mother and daughter are sitting down over afternoon tea. The mother
   wants to show her
   daughter that she's a hip parent and tries to get her daughter to open
   up and talk about
   dating boys and what it's like for her.
   Mom: So....now that you have started dating, what's it like getting
   intimate with young
   men?
   Daughter: Oh you know how it is, boys are always insensitive and never
   care if intimacy
   isn't working for me.
   Mom: How?
   Daughter: Oh, stuff....
   Mom: Really now, you can trust me. I think that its important for
   mothers and daughters to
   talk about these matters...
   Daughter: I don't know.....
   Mom: Now don't forget, I was a teenager once and I can remember what
   dating boys was
   like for me, believe I remember
   Daughter: Really?
   Mom: Really...
   Daughter: Ok, for starters, how did you get their cum out of your
   eyes?
   

Q: What do Israeli soldiers do when they get bored?
A: They go over to the West Bank & the Gaza Strip and get stoned.

Boss, to four of his employees: "I'm really sorry,
but I'm going to have to let one of you go."

Black Employee: "I'm a protected minority."
Female Employee: "And I'm a woman."
Oldest Employee: "Fire me, buster, and I'll hit you with an
age discrimination suit so fast it'll make your head spin."

...To which they all turn to look at the helpless young,
white, male employee, who thinks a moment, then responds:
"I think I might be gay..." 

By voting you are helping select today's best joke. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best jokes to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read Today's Stories Today's Poems Today's Quotes Today's Funny Pic   March '10 Jokes Issues: S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31