Today's poems [2.19.10]

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An indolent vicar of Bray 
            Kept his wife in the family way, 
                Till she grew more alert, 
                Bought a vaginal squirt, 
            And said to her spuose, "Let us spray!" 

Since the girl couldn't type, she was fired;
And asked to explain why she was hired.
"The executive's dong
Is only four inches long.
I thought shorthand was all he required" 

"Eat meat, whale meat, Give yourself a treat

(Shiney crappy meaty creatures)

Pull that baby off your teat, fill it`s face with whale meat

(Smiley Jappy people nourished)

Here come the whaleing fleet. Meet. Great. Yummy treat.

(Shiney crappy meaty creatures)"

Seven wise men with knoweldge so fine,

Created a pussy to their design.

First was a butcher, smart and with,

Using a knife, he gave it a slit.

Second was a carpenter, strong and bold,

Using a hammer and chissel, he gave it a hole.

Third was a tailor, tall and thin,

With a piece of red velvet, he lines it within.

Fourth was a hunter, short and stout,

With a piece of fox fur, he lined it without.

Fifth was a fisherman nasty as hell,

He threw in a fish, and gave it a smell.

Next came a pretcher whose name was McGee,

Touched it and blessed it and said it could pee.

Last came a biker, dirty little nut,

Sucked it and fucked it and called it a cunt.


Sent by Christine

A wonderful fish is the flea, 
            He bores and he bites on me. 
                I would love, indeed, 
                To watch him feed, 
            But he bites me where I cannot see. 

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