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Today's jokes [12.4.10]

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Why are women like snow flakes??
 
         They are all beautiful.
         They are all different.
         They can all be cold as ice.
         But they'll all melt when they land on your face......

1. 




The State of Florida had a problem. The drug bust over the years had filled
their storage areas with Marijuana. It was decided  the only option was to
burn all of the Marijuana on hand. The eventful day a huge mound of Marijuana 
was torched. The fire raged and the smoke of the weed raised in a large cloud. 
At this time a flock of Tern's flew through this cloud.
A group of forest rangers (aka Their environmental watch dogs) were sent out
to assure the well-being of the Terns . They followed this flock until they
finally landed. The rangers sneaking upon the terns were able to observe and
issue a report that read:  Not a Tern was left unstoned.



2. 




Q: What was the last thing to go through Cobain's mind?
A: The roof of his mouth.


3. 




Mrs. Culpepper was almost in tears. "Oh Marie," she said to her maid, "I have reason to suspect that my husband is
having an affair with his secretary."

"I don't believe it for one minute !" Marie snapped."You're just saying that to make me jealous !!!" 


4. 




WARNING! PLEASE READ IMMEDIATELY! 

THIS IS SERIOUS! If you get an envelope from a company called the Internal 
Revenue Service," DO NOT OPEN IT! This group operates a scam around this 
time every year. Their letter claims that you owe them money, which they 
will take and use to pay for the operation of essential functions of the 
United States government. This is untrue! The money the IRS collects is 
used to fund various inefficient and pointless social engineering 
projects. This organization has ties to another shady outfit called the 
Social Security Administration, who claim to take money from your regular 
paychecks and save it for your retirement. In truth, the SSA uses the 
money to pay for the same misguided make-work projects the IRS helps 
mastermind. These scam artists have bilked honest, hard working Americans 
out of billions of dollars. Don't be among them! FORWARD THIS MESSAGE TO 
EVERYONE YOU KNOW!

5. 



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Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



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