Today's Jokes  |  Archives  |  Lists  |  Random  |  Register  |  RandJoke on Your Page  
 


Today's jokes [11.5.10]

Vote for the joke that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to joke categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your joke reading.


What sits at the bottom of the ocean and shakes?


                    A nervous wreck.

1. 




A guy takes his greenhorn wife hunting on a ranch. When they reach their 
deer blinds, the guy says, "If you shoot a deer, be sure not to let 
somebody else say he's the one who shot it. Otherwise, he'll take the deer 
from you. The deer belongs to whoever shoots it." The guy goes to his own 
blind. Ten minutes later, he hears his wife shooting from her blind 
nearby. He rushes over and finds her pointing her rifle at a cowboy who's 
hollering, "Awright, lady, awright--you can have the goddamn deer! Just 
lemme get my saddle off it!"

2. 




AMNESIA:

Condition that enables a woman who has gone through
labor to have sex again.



3. 




   I've noticed the strangest thing about men who hang out in bars a lot.
   It seems they have only one of two reasons to be there:
   
                     They have no wife to go home to...
                                or they do.


4. 




Two brothers, ages 6 and 8, decide they are old enough to start cursing. So
they plan to use dirty words the next morning at breakfast. The 8-year-old
says he'll use the world HELL and tells the 6-year-old to use ASS.
Well, the next morning they head downstairs for breakfast. And when their
mother asks them what they want, the 8-year-old says, "Ah, Hell, I'll have
some Fruit Loops."
Shocked, the mother wheels around and backhands him on his
chair, sending him screaming back upstairs. She then turns to the 6-year-old
and says, "What are you going to have?" He replies, "I don't know, but
you can bet your ass it ain't gonna be Fruit Loops."

5. 



BONUS! A random joke from Jokes2Go database
If you don't like it, just hit RELOAD




Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



By voting you are helping select today's best joke. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best jokes to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read

Today's Stories
Today's Poems
Today's Quotes
Today's Funny Pic

 November '10 Jokes Issues:
S  M  T  W  Th F  St
   1  2  3  4  5  6  
7  8  9  10 11 12 13 
14 15 16 17 18 19 20 
21 22 23 24 25 26 27 
28 29 30 

Jump to  



For any questions or comments email us at info@jokes2go.com
Copyright© SpekGY, Inc, 1998-2016. All rights reserved.