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Today's jokes [11.4.10]

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   Once upon a time, a woman complained to her doctor that she and her
   husband never had sex anymore. So the doctor gave her a bottle of
   pills and told her to put them in his drink and she would be
   'satisfied.'
   
   The woman, somewhat disbelievingly, put one pill in his coffee that
   evening. That night they made out.
   
   The next morning, she put two in his coffee, and that night they
   really got it on.
   
   The next day, she said, "What the hell," and put the entire bottle in.
   
   A few days later, the doctor called to check on her progress. The
   woman's son answered the phone. When the doctor asked how she was
   doing, the son replied, "Mom's dead; Sis is pregnant; my asshole
   hurts, and Dad is out naked on the front lawn yelling 'Here kitty,
   kitty.'"
   


1. 




The old man was saying to his doctor,
"You know, Doc, when I was young, it was as hard as a rock. As I got a 
little older, I could bend it a little and now I can bend it alot. Does 
that mean I'm getting stronger?"

2. 




What do you get when you cross a Rooster with an owl?

A Cock that can stay up all night!!



3. 




CONDOMINIUM

A prophylactic for midgets.

4. 




What's the difference between white onions, brown onions and a 30 centimeter
dick?

Nothing....  They all make your eyes water.

5. 



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Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



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