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Today's jokes [11.15.10]

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A young girl had not been feeling well and went to her family 
doctor. "Young lady," the doctor began, "you're pregnant."

"But that can't be. The only men I've been with are nudists and 
in, our colony we practice sex only with our eyes."

"Well my dear," said the doctor, "someone in that colony is 
cockeyed."

1. 




Two men were talking to each other about how pussy taste.
The first guy said"I think it taste like cherry pie".The
other guy said "I think it taste like shit".Then
the first guy said "you are supposed to turn her over".

Sent by Don Chamberlin

2. 




Why did the woman with P.M.S. cross the road? 

     She just did, alright!! 

3. 




A young peasant girl of fourteen went to work in a broom 
factory.  After 2 months she gave the boss a two-week notice. 
The boss was quite unhappy to let her go since she was hard 
working, knew her tasks etc.  He called her into his office, "But 
why?" he asked.

"Nothin, I just wanna quit that's all,"  she said sullenly.

"Look, I'll give you a raise."

"No," she said

"You can't just quit like that. There must be a reason. Tell me."

"Okay if you must know..." said the girl, and she took off her
underwear and pointed to her pubic hair, "Look I haven't had 
this before, it's the broom's bristles, I tell you..."

Tickled by her innocence, he too took off his underwear and 
showed his, and said, "Ha ha...my dear it's nature. Look I have 
it too...." 

"Oh no!" the girl cried, "I can't wait two weeks, I quit now! Not 
only do you have the bristles, but you've grown the handle as 
well."

4. 




   A guy is stranded on an island with only a Doberman and a pig for
   company. There's
   plenty of food and water, and the weather is beautiful, so he's doing
   alright--but after a few
   months he gets "lonely", if you know what I mean. The pig starts to
   look more and more
   attractive--soft, pink flesh, round buttocks, etc. But every time this
   poor guy makes an
   advance towards the pig, the Doberman snarls at him and once almost
   bit his leg. One day
   the guy sees a speck on the horizon, so he swims out there and it
   turns out to be a dinghy,
   cast adrift, and in the bottom of the boat is a beautiful woman,
   unconscious. He drags her
   to shore and brings her into his hut and slowly nurses her back to
   health. Finally she is
   well enough to walk and she says to him "Thank you, thank you for
   saving my life. I don't
   know how I can ever repay you. I'll do anything for you, anything,
   just name it." The guy
   thinks for a minute and says "Would you mind taking my dog for a
   walk?"
   


5. 



BONUS! A random joke from Jokes2Go database
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Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



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