Today's poems [1.19.10]

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There once was a queen of Bulgaria
Whose bush had grown hairier and hairier,
Till a prince from Peru
Who came up for a screw
Had to hunt for her cunt with a terrier.

There was a young vampire called Mabel
Whose periods were very unstable.
One night by the moon,
She pulled out a spoon
And drank herself under the table. 

There was a young man of Newminster Court 
            Bugger'd a pig, but his prick was too short. 
                Said the hog, "It's not nice, 
                But pray take my advice: 
            Make tracks, or by the police you'll be caught."

A young girl who was no good at tennis
But at swimming was really a menace
Took pains to explain,
"It depends how to train;
I was a streetwalker in Venice."

There was a young lady of Exeter, 
                                        So pretty, that men craned their necks at her. 
                                                      One was even so brave 
                                                      As to take out and wave 
                                        The distinguishing mark of his sex at her. 

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