Today's stories [9.2.09]

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Important Press Release: 

The manufacturers of KY Jelly have announced that their product is now 
fully Year-2000 compliant. In the light of this they have now renamed it 
as: "Y2KY Jelly". 
Said a spokesman: "The main benefit of this revision to our product, is 
that you can now insert four digits into your date instead of two."

Texas Survivor

Contestants have to drive from Amarillo to Tyler
with a bumper sticker that says "I'm a gay atheist
vegetarian...and I'm here to take your guns." 

...If anybody gets there, they win.

In a Tacoma, Washington men's clothing store: 

     "15 men's wool suits, $10. They won't last an hour!" 

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